It is pretty "ridunkulus" aaaghh i dont know how to spell it. haha.
Anyway, My final for my m122 class is in about 3 hours and 45 minutes. yipee.
How ready do I feel? 56%.. i think? haha. There's just alot of material. Although I can confidently say that I seriously did not procrastinate or slack off for this class-- I'm still quite unprepared. which is sorta depressing but whatever..
This round of finals has been the scariest for me. 1 down, 1 today, 1 to go. Many times I feel quite discouraged from how un-prepared I feel despite how hard I studied throughout the quarter. Endless nights in study rooms, sacrificing sleep so I dont fall behind, missing out on hang out oppurtunities just for the sake of trying to keep up. ( I didnt even watch "Up!" and I hear its really goood..) however, I dont feel too distraught. More and more I feel like I'm learning to see how trivial and foolish it is to be so consumed with worry and disappointment on small things like these tests. (even if they are finals, and even if my final is 60% of my grade, even if I dont feel ready, even if this sucks.)
As lame as it sounds, I just want to do my best. I know that sounds really lame and cheesy.. haha. But I just want to give it all I got, take it, and move on without looking back-- even if I dont do as well as I hoped. If my heart's desire is that He would use me for His purposes, I just want to make sure taht I do as much as I humanly can so that I could be as equipped and prepared as possible so He could use me. sigh
This is bryan. He is one of the nicest guys I know and he rides his bike around but he doesnt look like a loser. He's super smart and he has the best study techniques ever. I'm really thankful that I got to take this class with him this quarter because he always threw in words of wisdom every now and then about study techniques, my well-being, and life in general. he's going to be a LARC tutor next quarter and I'm soooo confident (1734732%) that he is going to be the best one ever. He likes to eat food. His favorite word is Ree- dun-ku- lus. I teach him korean words like molla and joggum
This is Denise. She has the neatest writing I've ever seen in my life. Seriously if you saw it you would freak out. She really loves details and is very diligent in making notecards, pages and pages of outlines and writes on humungous posters. Denise is one of the sweetest girls I've ever met and she is a constant encouragement to me and I'm so thankful to have a sister like her :) I'm actually taking both of my bio classes with her and I'm so thankful for her because she likes repeating things when she studies (which helps engrain it in my head) and she always reminds me to use these classes to glorify God. She has a cute laugh and I like holding her hand.
In the beginning of the quarter-- we started this email thread on gmail. although it only lasted a few weeks, looking back at it now it encouraged me so much and reminded me of how faithful God has been to us even in this little quarter. I'm so thankful for them :)
--
One more thing,
So about 4 years ago I followed my dad to Dominca Republic for medical missions. There, we treated hundreds of people who had lived without medical attention all their lives. The kinds of conditions these people were in were super intense. There is one account that I remember really vividly til this day.
There was this woman who was unable to walk comfortable for about a decade because her leg and foot was super swollen. I remember my dad telling me that it was an infection due to some wound or cut and that the bacteria had infected it and had messed up her foot circulation. My dad had to needle that foot and ankle up x10000 and I remember having to squeeze and massage the leg really really hard to take all of the bacteria-ed blood out. I vividly remember this because of the amount of brownish blood that woman lost and how she would repeatedly hit my arms and head because of the unbearable pain it was causing her. I remember closing my eyes so tight trying not to let go despite the amount of pain I was causing her.. if anything good were to come out of this class-- I now know (or I think i know) what kind of virus that woman had.
I hope that woman's better now
if not, I hope when I become a nurse I can go back and nurture her in a less-painful way.
Here we go, micro. note to self: poe fo sho
give thanks-- yotb, emails, starbucks, bchao and denise, productive study times, and the motivation that comes from You
I wanna see UP too!
ReplyDelete