The joys of Spring quarter, Passion week and being more cautious

Let me just start this off with this picture:



This is where I currently stand in studying for the 2nd lecture of my Microbiology class. (The class that I so desperately wanted to get in) I spent 2+ hours studying for this class just now, and I find myself at Slide 40 out of 110. :) How exciting. Mathematically, it will take 3 and a half more hours to finish studying for lecture 2. How cooooooool

My schedule this quarter is really nice because it starts fairly early (9-9:30am) and ends pretty late (4:50pm) but I have really nice, long breaks in between which give me lots of time to read and study! My classes have been somewhat interesting and I'm really determined to get straight A's this quarter (not for the grades so much, but just as a reflection for my whole-hearted devotion to being a good student!) I'm going to be dropping that dreadful, feministic, women-power Women Studies class tomorrow (thank goodness) and I added another gangs class today and it's super exciting because there's alot of friends in that class!

cheers to a (hopefully) intentional Passion Week
Ok, so here's a personal confession.. Every year of my life until this year, Easter has honestly come and gone like nothing. When I look back at all the Easter's I've had previous to this year's upcoming one, all I remember is pink and green egg-hunting at church, looking for the plastic ones with candies inside, singing songs in front of church once, and I also remember we would gather on Good Friday as a church and carry a really huge wooden cross back and forth across the church's parking lot singing songs-- all of which had no affect on me what-so-ever. I feel so ashamed and disappointed in myself as I think back and remember how I actually took part in the cross-carrying event and how I used to do all self-consciously, scared of what my friends would think of me..shameful.

As I was preparing myself for Easter this year, I started to feel really really nervous for this year's Easter. I wanted to make sure that I wouldnt just let it pass by this year.. I brainstormed ideas of things I could do, passages I could read, prayers I could pray and goals that I could have for this week. I resolved to wake up earlier everyday to reflect on the last week of Jesus' life before His crucifiction and to really reflect and devote myself into remembering Him crucified, and the price He had to pay.

I spent an early morning today at a near-by starbucks and seriously, devoting in His word and coming to Him in prayer starts the day off in such a beautiful way.

Along with the daily reading of how Christ spent the last days of His life, I've been reading this book and its been the perfect addition to my week:
I'm really loving it :)

I really hope that I'll use this week to really renew my understanding and knowledge of what Christ has done for me, so that on good Friday when we remember His death that I will come before Him so broken and humbled and in awe of the magnitude of His suffering, and that on Easter Sunday that I will really rejoice as I've never done before and celebrate the great hope that I have now received because He lives. But what I hope for even more is that the weeks after this one reflected the refreshed and renewed joy I have because of my salvation and that my earnest desire to exalt Christ in all things would consume my entire life..

shut. your. mouth.
I feel like if theres one thing that we can always work on, is controlling and being cautious of what we say. There's so much power in words, if you think about it. Words can offend, demean, deceive, manipulate, hurt and discourage when not taken into good consideration. It scares me when I think about how much power I have in my words. People will judge the kind of person I am, the kind of positions I hold on different beliefs, and the very condition of my heart by the things I say. All people are prone to illustrate their own idea of some person by what they say. It scares me when I think about all the times I must've carelessly blurted out something-- and how possibly, to this day they may have created some misconception of who I am and what kind of person I stand to be because of those few-oh-crap-why-did-I-say-that-it-didnt-come-out-the-way-I-meant-it words. But on the other hand, words have so much power to bring joy, hope, love, fulfillment and encouragement to those around us. I cant even recall how many times someone's one-or-two words of encouragement made a miserable day a hopeful one. When I think back to think of how many things I must've said even in the past few hours that I regret, I want to gnaw my teeth out because I know that I can never take them back. What is said can't be unsaid, what people have heard will not easily be forgotten, and the damage I've caused is unrepairable.

sigh, there is no good thing I can say about this or else I would be a hypocrite.. so I hope and pray that we will all resolve to try harder with this. because I know I've been hurt by words before, and I know that I have oftened discouraged because of the fact that I wasnt more careful... I'm really left with nothing to say..

With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.
James 3:9-12

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching
Hebrews 10:24-25

Haha, Spurgeon is cool.


Give thanks-- prayer, being able to wake up, passion week, delicious bcd lunch with tracy and mel, remembering Christ crucified, productive days, going to the ARC regularly at last, looking forward to sleep, that You are more than enough for me.